Buster Tales: ‘The Ticket Situation’ @Ede

Buster needed a Dutch SIM card.

This was, objectively, a simple errand.

The phone shop in Ede was bright and efficient, staffed by people who radiated the calm confidence of those who understand systems. Buster took a ticket from the machine by the door.

The ticket said 77. The screen above the counter said 34.

Buster sat down. He opened his briefcase. He consulted his cheese cube, which offered no strategic guidance whatsoever.

He had been waiting for twenty-three minutes when the screen changed.

“Zevenenzeventig,” said the speaker.

Buster wrote it down in his notebook. He assumed it was a promotion.

He was still writing it down when a hedgehog appeared from the photo booth counter next door. She wore a lanyard that said BRIGITTE ~ KLANTENSERVICE and the expression of someone who has been solving other people’s problems since before the internet.

“That’s seventy-seven,” she said, pointing at his ticket. “You’ve been called three times.”

The screen now said 80.

“Ah,” said Buster.

Brigitte walked him to the correct counter herself, explained his needs in twelve efficient Dutch words, and a SIM card appeared in under ninety seconds.

“How do you do that?” Buster asked, on the way out.

Brigitte considered this.

“The Dutch system,” she said, “is not designed to confuse you. It rewards the ones who paid attention. You were not paying attention.”

“Fair,” said Buster.

“But,” she added, handing him a small laminated card that said ZEVENENZEVENTIG with the translation on the back, “everyone gets a cheat sheet eventually.”

Buster tucked it next to his cheese cube with great care.

He stepped out into the Ede afternoon with a working Dutch SIM card and a newly operational telephone presence, lighter by one misplaced certainty and connected, at last, to everything.