The Dairy Syndicate: Part 4, The Overhead Extortion
- Sunny J Shores
- 4 days ago
- 2 min read
After the absolute disaster of Phase 3, where his wives blindsided him and cleaned out the entire dairy supply while he was busy fleeing for his life from the dog, the rooster decided a tactical retreat was necessary. The domestic bliss of the hen house was officially compromised. He needed high ground, a fresh vantage point, and a new base of operations to plot his next move.
He relocated to the main barn, claiming an overhead beam right next to Grandfather Horse. The horse, a stoic old-timer who has seen it all, simply tolerates his loud, feathered roommate with the silent judgment only a senior equine can muster.
From this high perch, the rooster’s obsession only grew. At exactly four o'clock in the morning, long before a single ray of light hit the farm, he would shatter the silence of the barn. He wasn’t crowing for the sun; he was announcing to Grandfather Horse, the dog, and the entire sleeping world that against all odds, he still believed in the cheese dream.
But a true mastermind doesn't just shout from the sidelines. He executes a progression.
As the sun finally peeks up over the horizon, beginning to warm the crisp morning air, the rooster begins his rooftop stealth deployment. Refusing to lower himself to ground level where dogs, cats, and traitorous hens await, he hops precisely along the ridgeline of the barn roof.
He tracks his target from above, advancing closer and closer until he can make the final, triumphant leap straight onto the metal roof of my cabin.
Standing directly above my bed, he positions himself like a feathered sentinel and lets loose a deafening, localized alarm clock. There is no escaping it. He knows I'm awake, I know he's up there, and the message is loud and clear:
The early bird doesn't want the worm. The early bird is here to collect the cheese tax.
Comments